memoirs of an unemployed nigga PT.1 : F U 2 Sam’s Club

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I’m baaaacck!! Wow, I can’t believe that this is going to be my first post this year. 2015 to this point has been rocky, but I’m still hanging in there, AKA: I’m barely grasping sanity with the tips of my blacks ass fingers.

One situation in my life that has caused a lot of stress is job hunting. Flashback: for those who are new, last summer I was unexpectedly (and wrongfully) fired from my job at big box retailer, Costco. I wrote all about it here. So since I did not have a job to come back to during the summer, job hunting for “dirt poor wage” jobs, was once again a thing in my life. Towards the end of the spring semester I began applying for jobs. Not only did I apply to dozens of retail jobs, but also office jobs, praying that I’d at least get an interview.

One of the first places that I applied to in the retail category was Wal-Mart. Now, I honestly hate Wal-Mart. The stores are too crowded, the customer service is terrible, and the carts are old and sticky. Also, apparently Wal-Mart is one of the worst companies to work for, according to articles that I’ve read. All I know is that they’re paying $9 an hour, which is above average for most retail stores around where I live, and that was enough initiative for me to submit an application. I submitted my application to 5 stores and within 24 hours, my phone was flooded with calls from Wal-Mart. I wasn’t expecting the calls to come so soon, I still had about 2 weeks left in school so I couldn’t go to any for an interview, so I just decided to wait and resubmit my application when I got home and could schedule interviews.

At the same time I was surprised by the lack of calls I was getting from other retail stores I had applied to. Not because I have some “amazing” resume, but really? No calls. And I applied everywhere: Macy’s, Dillards, Tom Thumbs, Albertsons, Race Trac, Target, Home Depot, Lowes, L.A. Fitness, the list goes on and on. And I got no callbacks.

When I got home from school I resubmitted my application to Walmart and again my phone was flooded with calls and this time I got a call from Sam’s Club, which is the same company as Wal-Mart (or something like that). Sam’s Club is pretty much Costco, a place where I worked at “seasonally” (wink wink). I’m thinking that I am a shoe in for this job. A nice lady calls and tells me that she would like for me to come in for an interview the next day at 12pm. I get there the next day at 11:50, early because I am a professional. I’m in a dress shirt and slacks, and ready to get my job. They tell me to sit in the food court and wait for my interview. 20 minutes go by, 30 minutes go by, 40 minutes go by, then a frantic sweaty woman with a crocked wig ask me what my name was I tell her and she runs off. She then comes back but is circling the 6 tables in the food court, now talking on the phone with a manila file folder in her hand. She then sits down and tells me “the person who was supposed to interview you isn’t here but I guess I’ll do it”…Pause, did the original lady just forget that she scheduled an interview in the middle of the day? And this isn’t some top-level corporate job, it’s a freaking grocery store, one of the cashiers could interview me hell, stop sweating lady. So she interviews me, aka reads generic questions off of a piece of paper. And then she says she needs someone right away to become a cart pusher.. sigh now if you read my rant after I got fired from Costco I think I said “the only cart I’m pushing for now on is MY FUCKING OWN.” But at this point I’ll make some exceptions. Even though I know for sure when I submitted my application online that I didn’t select cart pusher as one of the positions I was applying for and had the person who actually scheduled the interview been here then I could have been offered the position I was called in for.

So she takes me upstairs to the office and I sign a bunch of papers and she for some reason had to look up my application on the computer. To her surprise under the cart pusher folder my application wasn’t there, hmm I wonder why… so she tells me that it was ok I just needed to go take a drug test and then re-submit my application and select cart pusher. Then I was supposed to call her when I got done. I only had 24 hours to take the drug test so right when I left the store I went straight to the drug-testing place. Then I went home and re-submitted my application. I was done! I was ready to start working. I then called the store, the person who answered said the manager was not there…. “Ok I’ll call back tomorrow”, I said. I called back the next day and they said the manager is busy and she’ll call me back, I wait a few hours and call again and she’s still busy. The next day, I call again, I then tell them why I keep calling and they say they’ll relay the message to the manager and she’ll call me back. No call. The next day, I call again, she isn’t there. At this point I’m fed the fuck up. First off I didn’t understand why I was calling her, when it would have made more sense for her to call me whenever they got the application and results from the drug test. And I know the results were clear because I haven’t smoked weed since February, I knew I would being taking drug test for jobs!! ..

So really that’s the end of the Sam’s Club story, I never got a call back…. This lady really never called me back, and I guess she’s the only damn manager that works up there. Did I want to spend another summer pushing carts in Texas heat?..HELL NO, but damn!! I can’t get at least get a phone call after I waste gas going half way across town to pee in a cup or after I sit in a fly infested food court for 50 minutes waiting for a rushed interview.

Wal-Mart Inc. has issues across the board obviously and my frustration with this shitty company only elevates after my interview experience yesterday with America’s biggest problem Wal-Mart, which I will talk about in the next post.

Thanks for entertaining my shit.

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